Showing posts with label baby #2. Show all posts
Showing posts with label baby #2. Show all posts

Wednesday, July 31, 2013

And then there were four...

We are excited to introduce our sweet baby girl

Lucille Kate

born on Sunday, July 28th at 5:04am
7 pounds, 4 ounces and 21 inches long


We are overwhelmed, in awe, and incredibly honored that God has chosen us to be the parents to this sweet little girl.  We love our Lucy Kate so much already and are soaking up every second of our days with her!

Sweet baby girl, this mama has longed and prayed for you for so, so long.  You were more than worth the wait.  We adore each and every little part of you!

birth story to follow... if I ever take a moment to actually put this little love down. :)

Friday, July 26, 2013

My last (hopefully) pregnancy update...

 I am 39 weeks pregnant today.
No picture taken yet, so please forgive me.
As of this morning I am 2.5 centimeters dilated and 30% effaced.
By now we had already delivered Swee'Pea and had him home a few days but let's not dwell on that little fact, shall we?
Popeye guessed we would have the baby on the 23rd and I guess that we would have it the 26th and we are just blowing right past those dates without any signs of a baby arriving any time soon.
My father-in-law swears the baby will arrive August 1st.
He has jinxed me.  Jinxed me I say!
First babies really shouldn't come early because then when you wait on a second baby you just feel shocked and confused.
I have cried a few times.  My hormones are a bit nuts lately.
I am not uncomfortable.  I'm not even really done being pregnant.
But I'm scared.
And anxious.
And ready to get this show on the road so I can meet my sweet babe.
But I'm thankful.
And encouraged.
That my doctor is supporting me going past her plans to induce me this weekend..
That the baby has a strong heartbeat and my fluid levels look great.
That my body is at least starting to prepare itself for labor and delivery.
And for people in my life who are encouraging, supportive, and willing to listen to my psychotic nervous chatter as we all sit on pins and needles waiting for our little boy or girl.
The floors are cleaned.
The bags are packed.
The car seat finally made it out of the box (although we've yet to install it... oops!).

And the Lord continues to provide peace in my heart.
Peace that the baby will be safe.
Peace that the baby will come when it is ready.
Peace that the right staff will be on duty when I check into the hospital, even if it means my doctor isn't the one on call.
Peace that he has chosen the perfect name for our little one.
Peace that he will equip Popeye and I with strength and knowledge as we bring this little one into the world.

We are ready for you, baby!
We've been waiting on you for so long.
I cannot wait to hold you in my aching, aching arms.


Friday, July 12, 2013

Some baby randomness.

twenty-one days people.
twenty. one. days.
and while most people at this point have finished their nursery and are basking in the glow of pre-baby peacefulness, i'm dripping in sweat and stressing out that i will never get everything done before this little one decides to make its appearance.
i'm dilated a fingertip, people.
a whole fingertip.
and while realistically that means this baby could come in days or (most likely) even weeks, 
for some reason it completely freaked me out to hear that i was actually even progressing.
last night as i lay in bed, breathing through increasingly more painful braxton hicks and praying my back pain would just go away, i willed the baby to stay put.
just a little bit longer, little one.
this little one just needs a little bit longer.
i need just a little bit longer to enjoy your daddy and brother just the three of us. 
a little bit longer to spend in quiet wonderment at the kicks and stretches within my belly.
a little bit longer of quiet peacefulness before the beautiful storm that is to come.
a little bit longer of just me and you before i have to share you with the world.
just a little bit longer.

*****

i am going to admit it.  i'm a little sad i don't get to do a baby room this time around.  we live in a teeny tiny house and will be squeezing the baby and all its business wherever we can see fit.  so while i may not be picking out paint samples or fabric swatches for this little one, i have spent many an hour drooling over style boards of "someday" rooms if we ever do get the chance to move on up to a three or four bedroom abode.

is gold and coral a theme?  because i'm obsessed with gold and coral.  with a bit of mint and yellow thrown in for good measure.
and how cute is this little boy's nursery?  i grew up in a farming community and it was once my dream to marry a peach farmer.  i had really weird aspirations as a high schooler...


both style boards courtesy of lay baby lay.

i have been sewing a lot these past few weeks.  finishing up projects i started at christmas.  sewing a sweet little boy and a sweet little girl blanket to welcome baby at the hospital.  and of course making cloth napkins.  because how can i bring a baby into a home without cloth napkins??

we live at the pool.  my child is a brown bear.  and i don't know what i'll do if we ever move from here because this pool has been my saving grace this summer.  also, i love this suit and will probably wear it for the rest of my life.  skirts on suits are totally hip, right?
i have reached the point in my pregnancy where i now have to visit the doctor twice a week.  i am a high risk patient and they have slowly been weaning me off my medications in preparation for delivery which means even more monitoring of baby.  i sat hooked up to this contraption for an hour and a half yesterday (the normal is 20 minutes) and i was so bored and in pain from having contractions in an awkward position that i wanted to cry.  it is uncomfortable and i had two nurses working on me because they were struggling to find baby's heart beat or keep it on the monitor consistently.  you can't nap because the monitor is loud and constantly beeping at you, and you can't use your cell phone which means i couldn't even play candy crush.  i cheated and snuck my phone to send my friends and my husband this picture.  because i really want everyone to feel like they are as much a part of these exciting appointments as i am.
also.  i sat sans pants under this paper sheet for over 30 minutes before my doctor came to see me.  within less than a minute she was paged to go deliver a baby.  i sat for over an hour more sans pants waiting for her to come back.  they didn't even offer me a snack or a capri sun while i waited.  
how rude.

as previously mentioned, we have a tiny house and have no room for a baby.  praise the Lord for this little nook we have in our bedroom.  for now the baby will be sleeping in a cradle by our bed and all his or her clothes and diapers will hang out here.  i am obsessed with the blue cart full of tiny newborn cloth diapers and wipes.  and our luggage is sitting there all ready to go in the red chair in case of a quick late night dash to the hospital.  sometimes i just sit on my bed and stare at this space.  a year ago we were still healing and mourning from the loss of our third pregnancy.  now we are less than a month away from welcoming a sweet little one into our home.  God is so good.  i will never stop proclaiming how good he has been to us through this entire journey.
my new almost-nightly ritual.  tubby.  downtown abby on hulu.  and cheap off-brand popsicles.  heavenly.
i made this hot/cold rice pack for my back.  after my tubby i warm it in the microwave for about 2 minutes and then hold it tightly across my lower back while i bounce on my yoga ball and watch more downton abby.  my life has never been so exciting.
 we are officially in "guess mode" for baby.  popeye, swee'pea, and myself all guess boy.  what do you all think?
 it only took my seven months but i finally finished his big brother blanket.  little brother blanket matches but on a much smaller scale.  i love this boy so much.  he is going to be the best big brother.  the best.
soon my lap will be filled with a nursing babe, but right now i'll take any chance i can get to cuddle both my kiddos close.  i love this boy so much it brings me to tears sometimes.  how is he almost six years old?? he has grown up in an instant over the past few months and i know bringing the new baby home will make him seem even bigger.  so i am going to enjoy these last few weeks of squeezing and loving on my sweet big boy, even if he insists on wiping away my kisses and or pulling away from my lingering hugs.
 he loves reading to me and the baby.  i might just pass out from how cute he is.
oh, sweet little love.  i can't stand how adorable you are.  i can't wait to kiss those sweet cheeks and look into those little eyes.  i can't believe you are growing inside of me.  what a gift you are!  we are all so excited to meet you... to know you... to hold you in our aching arms.  you have been prayed for and over for years and years.  i can't believe that my dream of having a baby is soon becoming a reality.  i love you to the moon and back, little mister or miss.  i love you more than you'll ever know.

Thursday, July 4, 2013

Counting down.

I'm quickly nearing my due date with this sweet baby.
30 days from today, to be exact.
And I'm feeling a million different emotions that I don't always know how to process or control I'm afraid.
I'm excited.
I'm scared.
I'm anxious.
I'm stressed.
I'm overwhelmed.
Both with the amazing sense that something incredible is about to happen and the amazing realization that the life that we've known for the past almost six years is about to dramatically change.
I text messaged my mom from my van the other day as I sat in the Babies R Us parking lot weeping.
I'd ditched my full cart of baby supplies and headed to the car before I completely melted down in the presence of strangers.
"What is wrong?" she asked.  "You've been preparing for this for years!"
"For pregnancy..." I said.  "I've been working and preparing for pregnancy for years."
But now there is almost a baby.
And goodness gracious did I ever really think we'd get to this point after all the years of fear and struggle?
But to this point we have arrived, and with all the scattered emotions the one thing I feel stronger than anything is that of love.
Sweet precious love.
For this little heartbeat inside of me.
For this little life God has created.
For this person who has yet to be named but is already so known by his or her Creator that even the hairs on his or her head have been counted.
Sweet, sweet little one.
I cannot wait to meet you.
30 days cannot pass quickly enough.




Monday, June 17, 2013

Oh. Hey baby.

I mean, it is clearly obvious which outfits I like wearing the most. 
Also, it is clearly obvious the days I go to work and church and wear make-up as opposed to the days I'm lucky to function enough to put on something other than Popeye's oversized undershirts.
I am feeling big and slow these days.
And super emotional but I can't event talk about it or I'll start crying again for the millionth time.
I'm so incredibly giddy to meet this baby and be done with being pregnant and uncomfortable.
And I am so incredibly not ready to bring home a baby and be done being pregnant with a big 'ol belly of baby.

This has been a sweet time, just me and this little one.
My heart is broken thinking that I'll most likely never get to do this again.
And although I am trying not to dwell on that too much, it helps me to avoid thinking about the other stuff.  
Like the swollen cankles.
And the fact that I still throw up at least once or twice a week.
How much it hurts to turn too quickly or sit up or roll over.
How much it hurts to see the ever-growing number on the scale.
That I have nowhere to put this sweet thing and thus have no motivation to clean or nest or put my home together.
And that I no longer see much below my belly.
Although I do have toes.  It feels good to still have toes.

Little mister or miss, we are so overwhelmed with emotions and the thought that your arrival is less than two months away.
Your daddy says almost daily, "Can't the baby just come now?!  Wouldn't today be a good day for the baby to come??"
And I remind him no, no.  You are safe where you are.  Safe and sound and growing plumper by the day.
And even though my arms are aching to hold you and meet you and know your sweet face and name, I know that all too soon this precious time will come to an end.
So stay tight in there, little one.
For at least a good 27 more days.
Or 44 days, according to Papa2 (he would hate for you to be born just before the soccer age cut-off).
We are simply dying with the anticipation of meeting you.
But your mama selfishly wants a bit more time of just you and her alone.



Monday, May 20, 2013

(Almost) 3/4 done..

I am now 29 weeks and 3 days pregnant.
Holy cow.
This pregnancy is moving along at both a snails pace and at break neck speed...
Some days it feels like it has dragged by and we will never get to meet our baby.
Some days it feels so close I panic realizing how unprepared we are for a little one to enter our home.
And almost every day I cry because I am so gosh darn in love with this little person growing inside of me.

I am feeling decently well.
Huge.  But healthy.
The spurts of hot weather we have had on-and-off the past month have not been pleasant.
And my cankles were less-than-happy after a week of being on my feet non-step for State testing.
But I am trying to be more active than I was with Swee'Pea.  
Walking and moving and only sitting still when I collapse onto my bed each night around 10 o'clock.
Or 7 o'clock, when I make the unfortunate mistake of sitting down for "just a minute" and then passing out with a bowl of dried off-brand Fruit Loops still in my hands.

But I continue to enjoy this pregnancy.
And I cling to every tiny kick and flutter and movement I feel.
Knowing how lucky I am that I get to experience this sweetness a second time.
Knowing how close we came to never having a second child.
Knowing that this very well could be my last pregnancy.
And knowing that never again will I be as close to this baby as I am during this intimate moments when it is just me and him or her.

Everyone keeps asking me if I am enjoying this pregnancy.
If I'm ready.
If I want a boy.
If I want a girl.
If I'm excited.
If I'm scared.

And the answer to all of it is "yes."
Yes.
Yes, I am enjoying this pregnancy... barfing, shots, aches, sub par bladder control and all.

Yes, I am ready to meet this little one... to put a name and a face to the sweet baby I'm already infatuated with.

Yes, I want another boy... a brother for my Swee'Pea, a little mister who I envision will be as silly as his daddy to balance out the seriousness of brother and mama.  I cannot express enough how much I love being a boy mama.

Yes, I want a precious girl... a little sister that will let me cover her in finger nail polish and hair bows and a lifetime of glitter and kisses.

Yes, I am excited... to become a family of four.  To watch my husband become a father again.  To feel a newborn in my arms after such a terribly long wait.

Yes, I am scared... of what could still go wrong in these next 10 1/2 weeks.  Of the moments when I don't feel the baby move for 12, 15, 18 hours or more.  Of the labor and delivery and the "what if's?!" that creep into my mind in the stillness of the night.   

Our house may not be ready for this little one's arrival, but our hearts have been ready for years and years.  I cannot believe that we are getting so close to finally meeting the little boy or girl that has captured my heart more strongly than I ever thought possible.  The thought makes me giggle and cry all at the same time.

I am so, so in love with you baby.
I am so terribly in love with every single bit of you.



Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Grow, baby grow.

Oh, hey there huge belly.  Where did you come from?  I'm pretty sure my belly has been growing bigger by the day hour second these past few weeks.  Each day I feel like I'm surely about to burst but then I look at my calendar and realize, nope... still several more months to go!  I'm so much... BIGGER... this pregnancy.  Bigger belly.  Bigger booty.  Bigger.... other areas.  And the recent heat wave (aka 75 degrees) has got me sweating buckets and swelling like a... something that swells a lot.

The beginning of this pregnancy felt super similar to my pregnancy with Swee'Pea.  I was sick like crazy.  I had extreme food sensitivities.  My chest felt like it was on fire for a good four months.  But that is where the similarities have ended.  My face is crazy broken out this time around.  I've developed both a weird rash and some very rude acne.  I'm gaining weight in areas I never really did (and much earlier than) in my first pregnancy.  I'm craving sweets.  I've never craved sweets in my life.  I'm way more tired.  Way more hungry.  And way, way less patient.  Something that has really surprised me about this pregnancy is how strong my emotions have been.  I'm crazy sensitive.  Crazy emotional.  And crazy temperamental all at the same time.  Unfortunately it isn't one certain thing that sets me off in any one direction.  Some days I'm as happy as a clam and the next I just seem to let everything get me down, annoyed, or frustrated.  So, you know, good luck for the next 3 1/2 months family and friends.

I'm obsessed with rubbing my belly.  Talking and singing and praying to the little one growing inside.  Because I have lazy children who rarely move in utero, I completely freak out as soon as I feel even the slightest kick or movement from within.  A highlight for me this past week was when Popeye got to feel a single solitary kick from our little one.  Big brother is going nuts waiting for his turn to feel the baby move arrive.  I can't wait to see his sweet face light up when he finally does.  Carrying a baby is such a joy... such a privilege.  I almost feel a little bad that Popeye doesn't get to go through this experience like I get to (although I think he is just fine letting me do all the work and getting to enjoy the baby when its all over).  

We've started to do all the crazy stuff I suppose you are supposed to do when you are about to have a baby.
Test driving mini vans.
Buying car seats.
Signing up for birthing classes.
Getting ready to purchase our cloth diapers.
Trying to figure out where in this tiny house another little person with a whole lotta stuff is actually going to fit.

It's been amazing, really.  Terrifying.  But amazing all the same.

But as wonderful as all this is, there are days when being pregnant is really hard.  Mostly because the excitement of meeting my baby is almost too much to bear.  I love love loved being pregnant with Swee'Pea.  I enjoyed every single second of it (even those spent hunched over the toilet).  And while I still find pregnancy such a miracle and I'm beyond thrilled I get to go through it again, I now know the sweetness of having the actual baby in my arms.  I could never really imagine what it was like to have my own child while I was carrying Swee'Pea.  Now the thought of it is so overwhelmingly amazing that it brings tears to my eyes imagining the doctor laying my sweet babe on my chest for the very first time.  I'll never forget looking into Popeye's eyes for the first time after we realized we had a son.  I'll never forget the feeling of them laying him on my chest, his chubby little cheeks wailing and carrying on as if he'd been waiting all nine months to tell us something important.  I'll never forget spending that first night doing anything but sleep as I peered anxiously into the bassinet beside me, worried I should call the nurse because he hadn't made a peep, and feeling completely in love but utterly terrified at the same time that they were about to send this little person home with me.  Oh, I am on pins and needles and bursting with excitement to experience it all again!  But as hard as it is waiting and waiting and waiting for this sweet little one to be ready to make his or her debut, I don't wish away one second of this pregnancy, and I know I'll be incredibly emotional at the end when I know my last days as a pregnant woman will officially be ending.  

Little one.  I'm dying to meet you.  I'm seriously glad I'm not an elephant and have to be pregnant for two whole years because I certainly don't think I could handle waiting that long to see your sweet face. You are the answer to so many prayers from so many people.  I will never ever get over what a miracle you are.  I am so excited to get to know you... to see your little personality develop... to watch your relationships with your brother and your daddy and me grow.  You are already so incredibly loved.  And you will probably spend the first several months of life being wrapped in my arms and smothered with my kisses.  So be prepared, sweet baby.  Because once they put you in my arms I fear I will never let you go.



Sunday, April 7, 2013

baby love.

Sweet Baby,

I can hardly think of words that are strong enough to express how deeply in love with you I am.  As I sit here staring at your precious profile, I am brought to tears and completely baffled that I am in fact looking at the face of a little person who is growing inside of me.  A little person I have dreamed about for years and have desperately longed to meet in reality.  It is sometimes hard to fathom, after years and years of longing, that it won't be long now until I am actually holding you in my arms.  That you are actually mine.  That my heart's desire is actually coming true.

My little one, these past few weeks have been tough on this mama.  I don't know if its my age, my medications, the scars of losses and longings of the past several years, or the combination of it all... but I have been particularly sensitive lately and have allowed a handful of thoughtless and ill-timed comments to momentarily let my joy over this pregnancy be stolen.  And I hate that.  I hate that I've allowed others to rob me of the preciousness that is this time.  I hate that I've allowed my negative emotions to take control of my heart.  I hate that I've given in to the aches and pains of my body and my mind and my soul.  And I'm sorry.  I'm sorry that for a few weeks I lost sight of what was truly important here.  Not my weight.  Not my skin.  Not my aches.  Not my inability to do. see. go. like I'm so used to doing.  No.  You are what is important.  You growing and thriving and blossoming bit by bit and day by day is what is important.  Nothing else matters but getting you here safely.  Not my crazy hormones or my bloated belly or my face that saw better days when it was in Junior High School.  Not one of those silly things matters when I remember how incredibly worth it it will all be once I meet you.

Sweet love, I am literally counting down the moments until I am holding you for the first time.  I am so ecstatic and practically giddy with the thought of what is to come.

Labor.
Delivery.
Nursing.
Sleepless nights.
Countless diaper changes.
And breathing in that sweet baby smell.

I am not scared of the pain.  I'm not anxious about the recovery.  Because instead of looking at it as an I have to go through that all again... I am completely utterly in awe of the fact that I get to do this all again.  Because for so long that wasn't something that I thought would actually happen.  And now here we are.  One hundred seventeen days (or less!) from meeting you.  I can hardly stand it the anticipation is so overwhelming.

I cannot wait to meet you, my little love.
To kiss you for the first time.
To count your fingers and toes.
To see the look on your daddy's face when he tells me if you are a boy or a girl.
To finally put a name to the sweet one who has been growing in my belly.
To introduce you to your brother.
He might be even more excited about your arrival than even I am, if that is even possible.
To bring you home.
To feel complete.
Because as beautiful as our life has been just the three of us, there has always been a little hole in my heart just aching to be filled.
A little hole that couldn't be filled until now.
A little hole that God fully and beautifully intended to be filled by you.

I love you, sweet baby.
I always have.
I always will.

Love, 
Mama

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

The downhill slope.

I am officially in my 2nd half of pregnancy.



And it feels like it is both flying by and dragging along all at the same time.

This pregnancy is so different than my pregnancy with Swee'Pea, yet so much the same all at the same time.  I have been sick, I have had cravings, I have had too, too many sleepless nights.  And when people ask how I'm doing I try to positively answer, "Great!"  Because that is how I want to feel!  But truth be told, pregnancy is hard on my body.  And the past several years of infertility and the medication and the losses have really taken their toll on this heart of mine.  So even though I smile through the achy joints and the puke fests and the exhaustion, the fact remains that I am spent.

I have been pregnant 37 weeks out of the past 20 months.  Long enough to deliver a full-term baby.  So even though I know I'm still a good four months out from delivering this sweet little baby, I can tell you with full confidence that I am ready.

Ready to meet this little mister or missus of mine.
Ready to hear his or hear sweet cry.
Ready to count his or her sweet little fingers and toes.
Ready to kiss those sweet baby cheeks and lips I've dreamt about for so, so many years.

I do not take this pregnancy for granted. Nope.  Not for one single second.  But gone are the carefree days of being pregnant with Swee'Pea and hardly giving a second thought to the fact that he would in fact arrive into this world safe and sound.  There is fear involved in pregnancy after infertility and loss.  A crippling fear I never even knew could exist.  And there are weeks and weeks where I feel positive and happy and rejoicing in the little life that grows inside of me.  But then it takes just one person close to me having a miscarriage.  And then two.  And then three.  And that fear slowly starts to creep back in until it settles like pit of black tar sticking on every bit of peace and trust I've had since the moment I got a positive pregnancy test.  I loved being pregnant with Swee'Pea.  And I love being pregnant with this little one.  But even though I remain ever in love with my growing belly, the ripples of baby kicks lulling me to sleep at night, and the anticipation of waiting until delivery day to see if we will have a little brother or a sister, I know I won't 100% feel at ease until the day this precious child is placed in my aching and waiting arms.

The Lord has been so good to me this pregnancy.  So, so good.  So many prayers have been answered. So much peace has been given.  I am incredibly grateful for the little life that is growing within me.  So, so incredibly grateful.  I know this baby is a miracle from Heaven!  And with every passing day my love for him or her grows by leaps and bounds.  I can't wait to become a mother for the second time.  I can't wait to look into Popeye's eyes when he gets to be the one to tell me if its a boy or a girl.  I can't wait for Swee'Pea to meet his or her little brother or sister for the first time.  And I can't wait to bring our sweet one home and bring a sense of completion to this little family of ours.

Dear little one.  The waiting for you has been so dreadfully long and painful.  And the thought of waiting 19 more weeks to see your sweet face makes this mama's heart ache.  But I know you are worth the wait.  I know you are so amazingly wonderfully worth the wait.

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Baby bump.

Dear Baby.

We made it!  We are officially at the end of the first trimester and entering the second.  
And boy does that feel great.
While I have had so much peace this pregnancy and trust Jesus so much with your little life, there is such a sense of relief knowing we have made it safely past the first thirteen weeks.

I've seen you grow, grow, grow from a tiny bit of nothingness to a kicking squirming little wee babe.
I've heard your heartbeat in all its precious amazingness.
And, most wonderful of all, I've felt your first, sweet little flutters as you've rocked and rolled away in my tummy.

Sweet little one, you are a gift from God. 
A true and beautiful miracle.
And although we aren't finding out if you are a boy or a girl until we get to the delivery room, my heart already knows you.
You are my precious little one.  The answer to so many people's prayers.  And a daily reminder to me how gracious and loving our heavenly father truly is.

I am humbled that he has chosen me to be your mommy.

Stay safe, my sweet babe.
And know that you are already so incredibly loved.

love, Mama.




Saturday, January 19, 2013

Sweet Baby #2...

Dear Little One,

I can't believe you have been in my tummy now for twelve. whole. weeks.
I remember the day I hit ten weeks and realized it was the furthest we had gotten in our pregnancy since Swee'Pea and I cried tears of joy.
Knowing you were safe.  Knowing you were growing.  Knowing you were going to be ours.
We've followed your life at every step.  
From the the time you were a tiny little egg to now, you have been loved, adored, and so desperately wanted.
At our first ultrasound when we couldn't see you and you were still making your way along the crazy path you had to take to get to my womb I remember silently praying to God, "Please.  Please let this one be okay."
And God granted my prayer.
He gave me incredible peace, and so much joy I feel like my heart could burst.
And the next week your daddy held my hand as I waited with heart pounding for you to show yourself.
And there it was.
Tiny but strong.
A heartbeat.
And I couldn't hold back my tears.
Through weekly appointments and long nights of insomnia and morning sickness and night sickness and all. the. time. sickness and shot after shot after shot I have never stopped being grateful for the gift that you are.
And yesterday when your big brother and I went in for my last fertility appointment and saw you dancing and moving on the screen he clapped his hands and could not stop saying, "This is awesome!  This is so awesome!" and I again thanked Jesus for you.  
Over and Over.
I have never stopped thanking Jesus for you.
You are such a miracle, sweet baby.
A miracle on this often dark and desperately sad Earth.
A miracle from a good and gracious God I wish more people knew.
A miracle I pray is a light to all who get the privilege of someday meeting you.
And although my arms have ached to hold my own baby for so many, many years, I am content to hold you in my womb for six months longer.
Six months of just me and you.
Six sweet months of just me and you.
I love you to the moon and back.

love, Mama.

Weeks six, seven, eight, and ten ultrasounds.
Excuse the nastiness of weeks nine and ten.  I spent most of those weeks with my BFF the toilet.

Monday, December 24, 2012

Our Christmas Miracle...


We are honored, joyful, and overwhelmingly grateful for this precious gift the Lord has given us.  
We have absolutely seen His hand working in our lives this year, and we are so thankful He has chosen us to be the parents of this precious and most desperately wanted baby.  
Our hearts are so full this Christmas season as we are truly experiencing 
one of Christ's amazing miracles here on Earth.  
We are so excited to meet you, sweet baby.  July cannot come soon enough!