ten years.

ten years ago this week, popeye asked me out on a date.

he did it in front of family and friends by the Jamba Juice in his college town and I was so giddy with anticipation I could have burst.

a few days later he picked me up in his parents yukon and took me to a pizza place where i proceeded to be terrified to eat in front of him and he performed magic tricks to try and impress me.

i still have the tickets we won playing arcade games that night.

we stayed up talking until after 3 am.

i am pretty sure i was in love from the moment he came to my door.

the past ten years since that first date haven't always been easy.

we lived hours and hours apart.

we turned our lives upside down to move home and be with each other 

only to break up for a whole year just a few months later.

we've bickered.

we've cried.

we've been stubborn.

we've ignored.

we've rolled eyes and talked back and been defensive on more than one occasion.

we've been hurt and hurt each other.

we've been through more trials than i could have ever imagined as a love-struck college girl.

we've been ugly sinners in desperate need of forgiveness from God and each other.

but.

we've grown and changed and matured.

we've sought after God to guide us in our walks with him and each other.

we've trudged through the hard stuff 

not always knowing if there would be something beautiful on the other end.

we've fought hard fights for each other and with each other.

we've clung to this little family when it could have easily slipped through our fingers.

we've remembered our vows to Christ and to each other.

and it has truly been an honor being married to such an incredible person.

someone who can frustrate the dickens out of me one minute and make me laugh until i cry in the next.

a person who knows me often much better than i know myself.

who isn't afraid to call me out on my crap while still defending me to anyone who tries to hurt me.

who loves me unconditionally.

who has forgiven me and loved me far more than i deserve.

we have had a million special moments together.

and a million more that were just regular moments that somehow 

are just more wonderful because we did them together.

we've traveled.

we've laughed.

we've sung lots of Michael Jackson and watched way too much 

Seinfeld and Arrested Development for anyone's good.

there are a million differences between us but somehow we've made it work.

he hates leafy greens and soft cheeses.

i find most fried foods repulsive.

he could listen to comedy stations twenty-four hours a day.

talk radio is more my speed.

he is extremely into privacy.

i don't understand why i have to shut the bathroom door just to pee.

he enjoys action movies and sleeping in.

i prefer to read a book and wake up with the sun.

he argues just for the sake of having (and winning) an argument.

i am defensive and can never seem to get around his circular logic.

his idea of a perfect vacation is laying on a pool raft doing nothing.

i might just drive him crazy with my plans to drive cross country 

and hit every national park along the way.

and we both like to have the last word.

but somehow, amongst all those differences, we've found a sweet and special love.

i depend on him to keep me sane and strong and sensible when i'm acting like a crazy emotional fool.

he depends on me to keep our sheets clean and our lives organized and our child educated and fed.

we both have a special job in this relationship and i'm thankful for the fact that popeye regularly acknowledges and appreciates the jobs i do to keep our family and home running and functioning.

our marriage isn't perfect.

but to be honest, the hard stuff is what has made this marriage so sweet.

we've risen up many valleys and climbed many difficult mountains.

and at the end of the day, i can truly say i would rather hang out with him than 

anyone else on this planet.

popeye.

you've seen and known me at my very worst.

you've loved and forgiven me more than i deserve.

you've been patient and kind with me through so many obstacles.

you drive me nuts.

seriously.

but i love you unconditionally through that nutiness.

i admire the freedom you have to live worry free.

your confidence.

the fact that you always believe everything will turn out fine.

and your tenacious spirit.

(except when you are using it to try and wear me down.  then i want to just throw a pillow at you.)

thank you for putting up with me when i seem to have a one-way ticket to crazy town.

thank you for laughing with me about ridiculous things and quoting Seinfeld at the perfect moments.

thank you for putting up with my shenanigans and allowing me to have a free spirit, even though i know i regularly drive you nuts with my piles and messes and projects galore.

thank you for loving me enough to take me traveling and hiking and exploring to my heart's content.

for knowing me well enough to know that pancakes and museums are my love language.

and for enjoying meat buffets and hotel beds and blended margaritas as much as i do.

i appreciate the ways you show me you love me.

by never giving up when i so desperately wanted another baby.

by being patient through my days and weeks and months of mourning over the ones we lost.

by encouraging me and praising me in my parenting and schooling of swee'pea.

by truly putting me above all other people and things.

i have loved you and still love you more than i ever thought possible.

i have prayed for you... for this marriage... more than anything else i've ever prayed for.

i have fought for you.... for this marriage... more than anything else i've ever fought for.

you are still one of the cutest boys i've ever laid eyes on.

and i still swoon every time i see you in your uniform.

you may not like to cuddle with me or let me touch you with my feet.

but until the day we grow old and senile and can't remember each other's names or faces,

 i will never stop having the hots for you.

well.  even still.  because i think you will probably be a super hot old man.

i love you more than harry potter and zweibach and rosemary's ice cream and NYC combined.

times a million.

thank you for loving me in return.

it has been the greatest decade of my life being with you.

and i can't wait to see what the next decade has in store for us.

My loves.

These two.

Like two peas-in-a-pod.

"When will Daddy be home??"

I hear it a million times a day.

Completely smitten with his father, this boy of mine.

Begging to see him.  

Play with him.  

Cuddle and smother and cover him with kisses and love.

He has big plans for their summer.

The beach.

Then Legoland.

And lots of time at the pool.

In the fall they are going to help each other take care of the baby while mommy is at work.

Daddy can change the diapers, Swee'Pea will do the feedings.

Apparently they will be just fine without 'ol mama in the way.

I couldn't have asked for a better partner to parent with.

He is patient when I am not.

Stern when I give in.

Fun when I am tired and worn out and ready for a break.

He is more than I could have ever envisioned.

Hands on.

Kind.

A leader and a teacher.

He rarely says "no" to the pleas of his biggest admirerer.

And lets him tag along on errands and outings of all kinds.

I have loved seeing their relationship grow.

I have loved the fact that they get days together just the two of them while I'm at work.

I have loved seeing their bond change and transform over the past several years.

And I have loved seeing the sweet adoration each one has for each other.

I can't wait for this new little one to meet his or her incredible daddy.

How lucky my children are to have such an amazing dad!

I had always imagined what my future would be like with my future husband.

Popeye in no way fits that mold... he has broken it, a million times over.

God gave me the husband he knew I needed.

God gave me the son he knew I needed.

In his graciousness, God gave me the baby he knew we all needed.

I am so very, very thankful for my two men on this day.

For my husband.  Who is incredible in so very many ways.

For my son.  Who made us both into better people without even realizing it.

Happy Father's Day, my love.

Happy Father's Day.

thank you, sister dearest, for this sweet picture!

Many thanks...

Psalm 100:1-5: Shout for joy to the Lord, all the earth. Worship the Lord with gladness; come before him with joyful songs. Know that the Lord is God. It is he who made us, and we are his; we are his people, the sheep of his pasture. Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations.

I have much to be thankful for this year... But the one thing that sticks out in my head to share is my thanks for my amazing husband.

Popeye. What would I do without him? He is my rock. My sanity. My partner in life, in parenting, and in this voyage of life. He started out as just a boy that I fell for in what seemed like a minute, but over the years has developed into a man I deeply and passionately love and respect. Quite simply, he is my best friend.

We've had so many ups and downs. But what relationship hasn't? 2009 certainly has been both the best and hardest year of our marriage. And while our problems seem so miniscule compared to some of the battles that other people in this world are fighting, they are so very real to us. And just the same, each little victory is precious and amazing to us as well. We've learned so much about each other and from each other this year. On how to communicate, and to truly listen and not just hear. We've learned about boundaries and what we need from each other. He's learned that I need "me" time... time to decompress and gather my thoughts after a hectic day at work. And I've learned that he needs me to recognize and honor his simple requests... like replacing the toilet paper when there are just a few sheets left, closing my underwear drawer when I leave in the morning, or simply wiping up the ring left by my morning cup of coffee. We are far from perfect. But daily life has become easier as it becomes less of a chore we have to work at and more a way of life to communicate and share and just "do life" together.

There are so many reasons I'm thankful for Popeye this year, there is no way I could list them all... but I want to get them down in writing, not only to share with you all what an incredible man he is, but so that I'll remember these special moments the next time I want to tsk tsk him for not wanting to change Swee'Pea's diaper or for not writing down what he wants from the store on our grocery list (even though I've asked him to a million times...).

*He is always thinking of me. He calls me all the time from work. Or simply texts the words "I love you." He calls so much, in fact, that his supervisor has gotten onto him. Popeye told him he didn't care, he loved his wife and he was going to keep calling. Isn't that sweet?

*He puts up with me. When I'm moody and tired, when I'm self-conscious and scared. He puts up with me. And even more than that, he still loves me. Imagine that!

*He brings home little gifts for me. A bangle from a beauty salon. A book that makes him think of me. Sweet surprises that mean more to me than he'll ever know.

*He would do almost anything to make me happy. Upon reflecting on the Christmas lights he had just finished putting up on our house last week, I commented that the house would look better if the dormers had lights on them. Even though he disagreed, and it required a few hours more of work, he took his afternoon off and put up more lights instead of taking care of other chores he wanted to do. Now THAT is love.

*He cares about my feelings even when he does not and cannot understand them. Last week I text messaged him that I had had such a horrible day at work. Within moments he had called and told me to come straight home, he'd take care of Swee'Pea and all the errands. I was ordered to give myself a pedicure, drink a glass of wine, and watch a cheesy girl movie. Which I did. And it was fabulous.

*We share a wonderfully cheesy nightly ritual. We love to watch Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune. We refer to them as "our shows."

*He is the one person I can randomly say "B-R-A-H... B-R-A-H" to, and he understands it. And every time I text him with "this is Bowie to Bowie, can you hear me out here man?" he responds with "this is Bowie to Bowie, I read you loud and clear man... OH YEAH!!"

*He works his tail off... every single day... risking his life to provide a wonderful life for us. He takes over time shifts, often getting only 3 or 4 hours of sleep a day, just so we can have a Christmas this year.

*He takes on so much around the house when I'm too tired or stressed from work to get it all done. He weekly scrubs toilets and vacuums floors... and always takes out the garbage and washes the dishes with little to no complaint. He keeps our yard and gardens looking fabulous, and rarely complains when for dinner we are having yes, yet again, oatmeal or pancakes because that is all that is left in the pantry.

*He is taking me to his least favorite city in the world (San Francisco) to go to what may be his least favorite activity ever (Broadway Show) just because it is something I really want to do.

*He thinks I'm beautiful. And he tells me every day.

*He gets Dewar's late at night when I'm craving it, goes on ridiculously long bike rides to the park because I love to, and takes pictures in front of crappy old graffitied buildings with a smile on his face because, as ridiculous as he thinks it looks, I think it makes our family pictures turn out quite lovely.

*Quite simply? He adores me. Passionately loves me. Would do anything for me. Prays for me and with me. Leads me as Christ leads the church. Even when I'm stubborn. Even when it is hard. Even when he doesn't want to but knows that it is something that Christ has called us to do.

We lead a simple life, Popeye and I. But it is one that has been blessed beyond measure and one that continues to thrive through good times and bad. I am day-by-day and moment-by-moment thankful for him and thankful to God for bringing us together. In all our imperfections we are quite certainly perfect for each other. And on this very special Thanksgiving day, I praise the Lord for his planning and perfect timing in choosing me to be this man's wife. I couldn't be more proud to call him my husband... and thankful for the life and little family that we have created together through God's perfect plan and timing.

Thirty-six months...

Today marks thirty-six... thirty-six whole months since Popeye and I tied the knot.  For those of you who don't want to do the math, that is three years.  Three years of wedded bliss with the man I am confident I was born to be with.  The man who makes me laugh and cry... sometimes both at the same time.  The man who has been by my side literally in good times in bad, in rich (and poor! haha), in sickness but in many, many times of health.  The man who gave me the most precious gift of my son, and who fills each day with excitement and randomness and giggles galore.  

I love you, Popeye.  For everything you have meant to me, and everything you are to me.  For the way you love me in your own way... and for all that lies ahead in our marriage and our lives.  Thank you for thirty-six wonderful months, and I can't wait to experience many, many more with you!

And to celebrate this fantabulous occasion, I figured I'd list out thirty-six random things that I passionately love about my hot hubby... don't worry, none of them will be too terribly scandalous. :)

1. He takes out the garbage without me begging and without too much complaining.

2. He lets me sleep with the ceiling fan on each night, even though he is always freezing.

3. He encourages me to "live my dreams," like owning a bridal shop or starting an event planning business.

4. He talks about baby names with me... and even better, likes the ones I like.

5. He always eats at least one bite of whatever I have cooked... even if it is disturbingly disgusting looking.

6. He gets up with Swee'Pea at night so that I can sleep.

7. He is always appreciative when I clean the house.

8. He works his tail off to provide for our family now and for our future.

9. He cleans the house, takes care of the yard, does the dishes, and changes diapers without any prompting.

10. He always buys me amazing gifts that are both unexpected and undeserved.

11. He dreams with me about our future and our plans for retirement.

12. He helps me make our house a beautiful home.

13. He loves watching ridiculous amounts of "Seinfeld" just as much as I do.

14. He adores me.  Simply adores me.

15. He tells me I am hot... even when I am so apparently not.

16. He looks at my blog daily, even though he swears he hates blogging and begs me to quit.

17. He took it upon himself to make me the most spectacular herb and vegetable garden ever, giving up several weekends and endless nights rest just to get it done.  

18. He loves office supplies just about as much as I do.

19. He goes car shopping trips with me... and travel trailer shopping... and other kinds of ridiculous shopping that we know will not end in actual purchasing, but is fun none the less...

20. He is gung-ho about us being 100% debt free using Dave Ramsey... even though he does complain a bit about his lack of lunch money.

21. He lets me organize our bills and budget, because he knows how giddy it makes me.

22. He would be content if all I ever cooked for the rest of our lives was spaghetti and tacos.

23. He doesn't complain too terribly often that my favorite outfit in the whole world is old sweat pants and a Harvard sweatshirt.

24. He loves the smell of a bleachy-clean house just as much as I do.

25. He goes to get me Dewar's ice cream and Fresh and Easy yogurt late at night when I'm craving it desperately.

26. He likes to clean and organize the garage on a regular basis.

27. He always puts the toilet seat down, never leaves dirty underwear or clothes on the floor, and (almost) always puts his dishes in the dishwasher.

28. He makes radical videos of every little trip that we go on.

29. He changes the background on the computer screen almost daily to reflect what is going on that day or something funny we had been talking about.

30. He text messages me even though he detests it.

31. He loves coming home to our humble home and our little family each evening more than anything else in the world.

32. He looks smokin' hot in his uniform.

33. He can protect me with his bare hands with his mad cop skills.

34. He loves stupid movies like "Hot Rod" just as much as I do.

35. He has inside jokes with me that may be ridiculously stupid to anyone who hears them, but make me laugh all the same every time we say them.

36. He knew me when I was a total dork with ginormous coke-bottle glasses.  And he loves me just the same.

I love you, my hunky-hunky man-o-love!  I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with your and find a zillion more things to adore about you!!!

Introducing: Deputy Popeye...

Warning: If you are offended by a plethora of pictures, hot cops, and sappy wives completely in love with their incredibly incredible husbands, this blog post is not for you.

Saturday, January 17th has come and gone.  The day we never thought would come.  The day we counted down to and prayed would arrive swiftly and without a great deal of agony or pain.

The day Popeye was scheduled to graduate from the academy.

It was a long six months.  A long, long six months.  For both of us.  Er, all three of us, I should say.  I felt like a single parent a lot of the time.  Popeye was so tired and overwhelmed and busy with studying and boot shining and laundry when he got home from work that it was hard to ask him to help me with chores and parenting, let alone require it.  And Swee'Pea... oh, dear Swee'Pea.  He got lost in the shuffle many times.  Days would go by when we hardly saw each other, let alone our son.  What an independent boy he learned to be, playing on his own while Popeye studied or worked on reports, eating dinner without help while I busied to grade papers or prepare meals or get things in order for the next day's activities.

In the end, it was all worth it.  The crying, the pain, the stress, the worry, the work, the demands, the hours spent on bended knee in prayer that Popeye would finish each day safely and would make it through the hardest thing he has ever had to conquer.

In the end, it was so all worth it.  

I waited, full of anxiety, for Popeye to come home from academy the night of the 16th.  Tonight was the final night.  The night that would decide if he would come home a deputy, or a defeated man.  He shuffled in after 11pm, earlier than I had expected him, but without any indication on his face if he had good or bad news to share.  He walked over to where I was bustled up in a pile of covers and handed me a slip of paper containing his name and four numbers.  "Do you know what this is?" he asked simply.  I was cautious to answer, not sure if this was a trick or if he was just delaying the inevitable of telling me something had gone wrong.  "You badge number?" I hesitantly answered.  "Yes." 

"Yes."

That simple answer threw me into a whirlwind.  I wanted to know everything, detail after detail.  I was so thrilled I could hardly contain myself.  It was true, he was done, he was a deputy!  I was delighted to share in this momentous occasion with him, but devastated when he shared that one of their top men was lost that night when he failed a scenario.  It broke my heart to think of him, shuffling in the door late in the night much like Popeye had just moments before to an unsuspecting wife, only to share with her much different news than he had shared with me.  

The next morning was a flurry of dressing and prepping as Popeye left after just 2 1/2 hours of sleep to head to his graduation while I arranged meeting times and seating numbers for our family and friends who were expected to attend the ceremony.  I was giddy when I arrived at the theater and spotted my love from a distance, dressed in his new formal uniform and armed with his new gun and a smile that could be seen from miles away.  

Moments later the lights dimmed, introductions were made, and the 40 men and women how had successfully completed the 26 weeks of rigorous training marched in step to the center of the stage.  

Flags were brought out, the deputies saluted, and it was all I could do to contain my emotions during the National Anthem.

I may or may not have bawled my eyes out throughout the singing of the National Anthem... or, ehem, the entire program.  

Swee'Pea spent a majority of his time eating random snacks that the oh-so-courteous staff at the snack bar gave us.  I'm well aware that hot dog buns and popcorn are the not the ideal treat for a 16-month-old, but it kept him happy, so I was delighted.

Many speeches were said.  One compared regular, law-abbiding citizens to sheep, following the rules and regulations of society and doing what is right and good by all.  But lurking in the world all around them are the wolves, taking any opportunity they can to steal and destroy and harm the sheep.  This is why the world needs deputies, or sheep-dogs, who can keep the peace, protecting the sheep and restoring order when the wolves get out of hand.  

Another speech, given by the class leader, really hit my heart.  He described how someone he had knew who had been in the force for 30+ year told him that he had spent his whole life protecting people he didn't know.  Now that he was retiring, this young man would carry on that tradition, protecting people he would never meet, and who never knew the good he was doing in their community.  People who never thought twice about tucking their children safely in their beds and sleeping without a worry or care in the world about the dangers that could be lurking outside.  He ended with telling the audience to sleep peacefully that night, because there were 40 more deputies on the street that desired nothing more than to protect the people of this county.  Those words still shock me days later, when I realize how unappreciative and how completely for granted I've taken the deputies and police officers in this town... I hear so many people complain about the crime and the gangs and the drugs in our communities... but do they ever stop to think of how much they have been protected from?

Class leader speaking... yep, I cried through this too!

It was them time to present awards.  The first went to four people who helped the academy tremendously by participating in scenarios.  The guy in the middle apparently "killed" Popeye's partner at one point.  Popeye said these people were incredible in their acting, and really helped the cadets to train for real-life situations.

Next came the cadet awards.  The three main categories were academics, top gun (shooting), and physical fitness.

Popeye was awarded with the top cadet in academics trophy.  He finished with a 95.9% average, and was the only cadet to score 90% or above on every. single. test. he took through through the academy.  Let me tell you, I cannot BELIEVE the amount of studying he had to do... he has three four-inch binders, five 2-inch binders, and a stack at least three-reams tall full of material he had to study and test on.  This accomplishment was amazing, to say the least.

After the three category awards were given, they announced that they would give a top overall cadet award to the person who scored the overall highest average in all categories.  The cadets were tested on so many different areas, and had to pass scenario after scenario where they had to make life-and-death decisions in an instant.  They also spent a week at the shooting range, EVOK (driver training), and countless hours learning defensive tactics, ground fighting, baton work, etc.

Needless to say, I could hardly contain my screams of shock and overwhelmed excitement when they announced Popeye's name as the winner of this award.

This award was so deserved!  He worked so amazingly hard!

The face of complete and utter shock and amazement.  I can't believe I am married to this incredible man!

Finally, with the awards and speeches said and done, it was time to pin the badges on each new Deputy Sherriff.  I could only imagine what Popeye must have been feeling at that proud moment... everything he had studied and worked for and the good that he believes in is represented by that amazingly shiny and beautiful badge.

Kern County Sheriff Donny Youngblood doing the honors of pinning one of his newest deputies.  

The 40 newest cops of Kern County taking their oath to serve and protect the citizens who live here.  

With his badge pinned on over his heart and his oath taken, the graduation ended and we were off to celebrate Popeye's amazing accomplishments.  Apparently it is a bit faux pas to make-out with a deputy while in uniform... but I had to admit, it was hard to resist throwing myself at him full force and kissing him with complete abandon.  

I was so excited to have everyone together to rejoice with Popeye a

nd our family on this incredible day.  I tried my hardest to keep the day just as Popeye had requested... simple, relaxing, and chock full of Mexican food and yummy salsa.

Everyone was in great spirits as we laughed and talked and celebrated the afternoon away.  We took picture after picture, posing with the man of the hour and enjoying the day with loved ones and friends.

Papa said a wonderful prayer for Popeye... he is a wonderful father and is so proud of his son!

Two of the proudest parents I've ever seen... Mama2 still calls almost daily and tells Popeye in amazement, "I can't believe you are a cop!"

This is what a giddy-in-love couple looks like after the husband finishes making it through 6-months of H.E.L.L.  Okay, this is also what it looks like when a woman is trying to kiss her man-in-uniform and he is trying to play keep away in front of the camera.  

I love these two little munchkins.  They were so worried about Uncle Popeye after watching the video of all the things he had to go through during his training.  They are very aware now that he is a "good guy" and he is going to protect them from the "bad guys."   You know, like people who break the rules and stuff.  :)

I know Scott sleeps better at night knowing his little brother is just over the fence, ready to protect him...

Already telling stories and talking "cop" talk...

Two of my best friends... if it wasn't for this beauty, I would have never met or married Popeye... and it if it wasn't for her supporting me on the other end of my bazillion text messages, I'm not sure I would have made it through the past six months of training as well as I did...

Two of Popeye's oldest and dearest of friends drove hours to get to see him graduate.  We had ourselves quite the little Wii/Newcastle/Seven Layer Dip party with them later that evening...

Mama2 was hilarious... she wanted Popeye's awards to be shown in EVERY picture... she was SUCH a proud mama that day!

The original six.

And then there were ten.

Already playing cops and robbers...

While we were partying it up, a little "incident" occurred.  A masked and armed robber came into the house and tried to break up the party, but he was quickly apprehended by the new Deputy.  

The Deputy being confronted by the armed man...

Putting his new-found skills and quick-thinking into overdrive, the Deputy was able to subdue the suspect...

He was taken into custody, and questioned...

The world is a safer place, with Deputy Popeye guarding the streets...

I cannot even begin to describe how incredibly proud of this man I am.  He is finally leaving the life he has dreamt of since he was just a little boy.  From his first ride-along in high school to the moment he made the decision to apply to the force back in October 2007, he has never given up the hope of serving his community and its people.  The rode was a long and hard one, with days that seemed unending and nights that were never long enough.  But he made it through, and is strong because of it.  I am so, so in love with him, and I am so grateful for all he has done and been willing to sacrifice to provide for our family and to obtain a career that is so selfless to the core.  I love this man.  Oh, how I love this man.  And I am so proud and thrilled and honored to call him my husband.  

Thank you, Lorie Beth, for taking so many beautiful pictures of our day so I could spend the time being smitten over my husband.  I love you, sister!

I pity da foo...

Watch out citizens of Kern County.  As of tonight, there is a new Sheriff in town.  Well, to put it correctly, a new DEPUTY Sheriff.  

It's official.  Popeye has finished academy.  With a signed letter from a commander and a slip of paper listing his badge number he was sent home for the night, along with instructions to return at o'dark hundred hours to practice and participate in tomorrow's (or technically, today's) graduation ceremonies.

It is the day we'd always hoped and prayed for, but the day we never thought would arrive.

My hunky man-o-love is a badge-carrying, gun-toting, baton-jabbing, peace-keeping man of the law.

Oh, how I rejoice with him this night.  And my-oh-my how I LOVE my studly hot cop.